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:blowkiss:
 




I’ve never felt like this before.
I was venerable and scared, and the worst part- he knew it.
I looked into his eyes, and he into mine.
I felt a warmth spread throughout my entire body.
He put his arms around my waist and I knew I would be safe forever,
If only we could stay like this.
He slowly pulled me closer, closer, closer…
Until I could hear his slow steady breaths.
My heart was racing as I slowly fell into his embrace,
Surely he could hear it,
He should be able to feel it- my heart was pounding so hard!
Slowly and ever so gently he bent down.
Our lips met.
His lips were soft and tender,
Then his lips opened…
His tongue was warm and sweet on mine.
I felt as though the rest of the world had disappeared and it was just the two of us standing,
There on the path.
I dreaded the fact that we couldn’t stay like this forever;
Lost in a kiss.
But too soon he pulled back, gently smiling-
He knew that it had been my first kiss.
I looked at him and I knew that I loved him;
This man whom only a year ago I had sworn never to speak to again.
There was no way I would ever understand it, nor he.
All I knew was that this was the man I was destined to marry.
My life had started the day I met him,
I could be nothing without this man.
He was my life, my soul, everything I needed and ever would need.
Maybe one day we would find a way to be lost in a kiss forever.
:iconmoonprincessserenity:

Author's Comments

I’ve never felt like this before.
I was venerable and scared, and the worst part- he knew it.
I looked into his eyes, and he into mine.
I felt a warmth spread throughout my entire body.
He put his arms around my waist and I knew I would be safe forever,
If only we could stay like this.
He slowly pulled me closer, closer, closer…
Until I could hear his slow steady breaths.
My heart was racing as I slowly fell into his embrace,
Surely he could hear it,
He should be able to feel it- my heart was pounding so hard!
Slowly and ever so gently he bent down.
Our lips met.
His lips were soft and tender,
Then his lips opened…
His tongue was warm and sweet on mine.
I felt as though the rest of the world had disappeared and it was just the two of us standing,
There on the path.
I dreaded the fact that we couldn’t stay like this forever;
Lost in a kiss.
But too soon he pulled back, gently smiling-
He knew that it had been my first kiss.
I looked at him and I knew that I loved him;
This man whom only a year ago I had sworn never to speak to again.
There was no way I would ever understand it, nor he.
All I knew was that this was the man I was destined to marry.
My life had started the day I met him,
I could be nothing without this man.
He was my life, my soul, everything I needed and ever would need.
Maybe one day we would find a way to be lost in a kiss forever.

Comments


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:icondb-raphael:
I like that. It seems purely magical to me. You're a pretty good poet, how long have you been writing?

--
The light of the cathedral descends, ever gracefully
in its majestic conquest of the worlds of thought;
I behold the Ivory Towers as they reach into the heavens
grounding all in rationality, in progress, this church of reason

dream forever...
:iconmoonprincessserenity:
I've been writing for about 5 years I guess, if you count the crap I did the first two years :) Thank you for the comment. That's what I was trying for when I wrote it, I originally wrote it for a scholarship I applied for- haven't heard back yet, but it was national and it's only been a month.
:frog:
:icondb-raphael:
If they have any taste, you're a shoe-in. If they reject you, then remember that jealously is an ugly them (talking about them). i've been writing since....I think middle school. I mostly write based on my mood or my dreams or travels, kinda like lil-angelic-star, but we don't have quite the same history. Anyway, keep writing and I'll keep reading, I love your work.

--
The light of the cathedral descends, ever gracefully
in its majestic conquest of the worlds of thought;
I behold the Ivory Towers as they reach into the heavens
grounding all in rationality, in progress, this church of reason

dream forever...
:iconmoonprincessserenity:
Thanks, I wonder about the scholarship though :) I try to write what I feel, but when it comes to sweet love poems I have no experience. The same to you about writing :)
:frog:
:iconmary-lynn:
This is a very good rendition of a love story. I definitely understand this moment. I liked your repitition with the word 'closer', but I think that if you are going to use that, you should add some form to your peice, or otherwords add more repitition. You are the poet, not me, but I think that this is a good start. You should try to work this into a sonnet, it would read elegently, and a sonnet of course is a moment. Nice work.
:iconmoonprincessserenity:
I wish that I could, but I have never had much luck with sonnets, so I don't think I'll try that. I'm going to try reworking it, yet again. I agree that it should have some form to it. Especially the closer part:

closer....
closer.....
closer.....

how's that? for a start?

--
"Will my knight ever step out of the shadows and save me, the dragon comes ever closer."
- [link]

People confuse me...
:iconmary-lynn:
Oh, no. I think that part was fine!, but there has to be other words that you could repeat, so that closer is not the only word that is repeated?
:iconmoonprincessserenity:
that makes sense, I emphasized that from the rest of the poem for a reason though. I wanted it to stand out from the rest of the poem. It may flow better if I repeat some other words also, however.

--
"Will my knight ever step out of the shadows and save me, the dragon comes ever closer."
- [link]

People confuse me...
:iconmary-lynn:
Yeah, it adds suspense, but I think there are more important parts, like the kiss itself? Maybe you could do something around there. Anyways, good work.

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December 15, 2004
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